Write for yourself

I am currently doing a writing course at the moment, and for one of the exercises we had to write for ourselves – truthfully and brutally honest.

So here goes ….

Step 1: Examine yourself

What upsets you? What do you find frustrating? What really ticks you off? Take note of that.

–         At the moment the whole world is upsetting me. A bad day, led to a bad week which has now led to a bad month! The thing I find most frustrating is myself, I am difficult! I’m difficult to please, but not only that – I am my own worst enemy at times. Its ironic though isn’t it, because when things are going great and you bump into colleagues, friends, family etc and they are in this mood I think ‘gosh, why can’t they just get over themselves’ BUT what do I do? The exact same thing, dwell on my problems, blow them out of proportion and walk around with a bad attitude! I am sitting here while I write this and shaking my head in disbelief – ‘I can’t believe I am like this’. A sense of embarrassment and doubt floods over me and I cringe, like I never have before. Why do ‘we’ let things get to us so much it starts eating away at our heart, soul and faith? It’s stupid really.

–         It was my 27th birthday last week and to say the least it was a pretty crap birthday. Things at work aren’t going the way they should. Actually, things are going pretty crap at work and somehow its spread its ugly tentacles into other areas of my life – argh!

–         Planning a wedding, working full-time and blogging can be really stressful – all these adjectives are making me tired and a little crazy.

–         I need to stop judging and start living what I ‘preach’.

Free-write. Spend time exploring the why of this. Maybe this bothers other people, too.

–         Today is a new day, a fresh beginning. It’s a day where the past is the past and it no longer affects the way we operate today. Today is now. Today is the present it’s a gift – why not seize it while we can?

–         We need to stop passing judgment so easily, as I mentioned above when I meet people in this ‘state’ it drives me mad – I think to myself ‘how can people act like this. Why don’t they just snap themselves out of it?’ Well, now I am in the state my perspective has definitely changed. I feel more inclined to accept people in this state now, partly because I feel guilty for judging people in this state and because I am in this state now and know it’s not as easy as ‘snapping’ out of it.

–         It’s ironic isn’t it though, since I run a blog called Attitude for Gratitude – yet I am not grateful when I am in this state. No, instead I am bitter, angry and wicked! I  What a fraud, I write, blog and talk about always having an attitude for gratitude. I should really have FRAUD tattooed across my forehead because that’s how I feel!

–         Life has its obstacles, it’s up and downs – a bit like a roller coaster. You don’t always know when they are coming but you know they could be just around the corner.

–         Grace. God’s Grace in fact is all we need. He fixes everything. No matter how many times I fall down, he is right there picking me up. Everything we go through has a lesson in it that God wants to teach us. Like marriage for me was/is a long waiting process. I’ve been with the high school sweetheart since we were 15 years old, we are getting married in Feb 2014 so 12 years later. During the 11 years old waiting I never thought I would ever get married, but this season taught me patience, love, gratitude and grace.

–         I am beginning to realise that we all live in seasons. Summer wouldn’t be appreciated as much if the other seasons didn’t exists.  We wouldn’t know anything different so how could we celebrate the warmth of summer if Winter didn’t exist?

Step 2: Challenge yourself

In the safety of anonymity (remember, you’re writing for yourself here), call out some unhealthy or unproductive habit or tendency that you have.

Don’t do it in a self-effacing way. God knows we don’t need another self-inflicted brow-beating. Issue a challenge to Yours Truly, and mean it. Do it in a powerful and motivational way. Inspire yourself.

This is my favourite way to challenge people — by being painfully honest about my own struggles. Some of my most powerful pieces were written from this place of dissatisfaction with myself. In fact, I wrote a book about it.

Tracey, you need some tender loving care – in other words some good old-fashioned TLC. You need to hear what I am about to say so please listen with your ears, you can ask questions at the end if you have any, okay sweetie?
Life can be hard at times, yes, but it’s not always hard. You know this, it’s just hard for you to see right now because you are in an ‘upset’ state. Think back to a time of complete happiness for you, can you picture something? Place yourself back in that situation, close your eyes and smell the air around you, take a deep breathe in and relax. Can you hear your infectious laugh that can brighten up a room? Can you see the other person smiling back at you with eyes fill of content?

Honey, you are going through a season of difficulties but you WILL come out the other side you always will. Everybody goes through seasons, we just need to learn how to deal with the situations on hand and take a step back and see what God is teaching us through these situations.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6 ESV

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2 thoughts on “Write for yourself

  1. Thanks Christina, I will check it out now :).
    Thanks for the encouragement, it was hard to post this on my blog but I did it and feel a bit more comfortable about it now. Look forward to your posts 🙂

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